Today is a bittersweet day for me, it is Jess's 12th birthday. Jess is my 4th born, and 3rd son (boy was Rebekah feeling out numbered on that day). Unfortunately, Jess passed away 2 weeks later, but today my focus is on his birth and the things he taught me while he was here with us. He taught me more about my faith and the power of prayer, he taught me how to be bold in my faith even though others may not agree with me, he taught me to love more deeply. So many things he taught me.... these are just a few. Today I will remember how each of the kids got to hold him and get to know him, how they got to participate in his first sponge bath and hear him cry. I will remember how his Daddy looked so full of love and pride when he held another son that he would play ball with. I will remember he looked like Bret and that he cried more than any of his brothers or sister did when they were born. I will remember holding him a few times and trying to nurse him. I will remember trying to get him to take a sip of breastmilk from a medicine cup so he could experience the taste and how he seemed to really like it. I will remember having the kids come to visit with Santa Claus at his beside and exchanging ornaments with them. I will remember that they all got to hold him for 1 quick snuggle that night and how encouraged we all were. I will remember praying with all of us together and daily with him and his Daddy. I remember singing to him. I will remember every good thing that happened in those 2 short weeks and I know it is by God's amazing grace that I have come this far. I will dream today of how you would look at 12 and wonder what would your spirit be like? Would you like sports like your brothers and Dad, would you like music? Would you be a thinker or a doer? So many things........ Most of all I give thanks today for your birth, your life and your love. I am thankful that you live with our Heavenly Father in Heaven and that today you are celebrating with the Angels. Happy 12th Birthday.
I love you.
6 comments:
Hi Leigh,
It is bittersweet...I have never lost a child and I don't want to tell you I know what you are feeling because I don't but I do know that GOD knows and I am glad you know him as your personal Savior.
Hugs,
LeAnn:)
LeAnn,
Thanks for your sweet comment and your Hugs!
Blessings~
Leigh Ann
Know that I always pray for you this week~
What a beautiful, beautiful tribute! Those with us for the shortest amount of time can leave the biggest impression.
Happy Birthday Jess!
Somehow this date today kept whispering to me all day that it was special, now I know why....I had never seen this blog before tonight. How beautiful your memories are. Seems like it was surely no longer ago than last week when the kids were all around the warmer helping me give him his first bath. They were so cute and wanted to help in any way they could. I think Bret and Bekah had foot stools to reach up over the sides of the warmer and 'help.' I remember putting on the Christmas socks or slippers that I had gotten him after his bath to go and greet his mommy. Everything was settling in by that evening. The next morning he had that little whistly noise and was tired. He was so brave going thru his xrays and blood work. I will never forget how amazed I was when his mommy came in and prayed over him that he truly belonged to Jesus and she was willing to put all her trust in Him as far as her baby was concerned, because he really belonged to Him in the first place, not his earth parents. That was a life changing moment for me Leigh Ann to witness that selfless love. I never thanked you for that, so I will now. Thank you for having the strength to do that that morning. You really touched my heart, and made me look at things differently so many times. Strengthened my faith, too. So on this day I will wish Jess a happy birthday and be grateful that he was a apart of my life too. He made an impacon my heart that changed my life in many ways. Happy Birthday, Jess...and thank you. Lisa Tiplady
Leigh Ann, I am a day late visiting your site. Hope you can visualize the encouragement you give others through your faith, strengthened by your loss of Jess. I teared-up reading your recall on Jess' 2nd birthday. Also, Lisa Tiplady's comments just pulled at my heart. Jess has made an impact on many. I remember the day we visited you in the Hospital. You had strength only God can give. I love you and all your family!
Di
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